Anger / Gratitude

Written July 1 around midnight:

Anger:

I'm up four pounds after losing eight last week. WTF?

I'm fed up eating the same shit over and over.

My mom is annoying me.

Husband too.

Backs of my legs hurt--an old problem that occurred, I thought, from sitting too much. I was out for hours yesterday and Sunday, walking and standing. The pain kept me up.

I feel fat, lumbering, whale-like. My belly wound had almost closed but the bottom popped back open after lifting my suitcase onto the bed. A lot of fluid is coming out of there. I should've bought stock in Stayfree maxi pads. *sigh*

No weight is coming off my belly.

I'm on my Kindle at McDonald's so typos are allowed.

I'm very unhappy. I am overwhelmed by a lack of inertia.

I need time alone. A lot of time.

I'm miserable.

***
Grateful that / for... 

• My health (returning). 
• That I'm American. 
• I have a place to sleep at night, to shower, read, watch TV, to do laundry. 
• That I can help my mom when she needs it most. 
• Cooler weather. 
• My Kitty children. 
• A running car. Omg how many beaters have I driven over the years, never sure if they would start? 
• Sunscreen. 
• Vitamins. 
• This Kindle. 
• Pay as you go crappy Android phones. 
• Good books. 
• The ability to read AND write. 
• Clean water. 
• Target. 
• Grocery stores. 
• Hawaiian barbecues. 
• Iced coffee. 
• Me.

Taken June 28 in Huntington Beach. Wearing the capris I bought in 2007 and which never fit until now...they still had the tags on them!! And are kind of big, now.  And holding one of my ubiquitous iced coffees :-)