Monday, February 24, 2014

Pre-Op Labs are Done

I overslept--of course--because I was up late burning the midnight oil to finish a project before surgery, then I read a few chapters of a book I'm enjoying and, well, it was after 4 am when I got to sleep. Why fight it? I'm a night owl.

But I got over to the lab before 2 o'clock, and took my Kindle fully expecting to wait a long time, but it was actually very quick. I think I was there at most an hour. I had to have what looked to be five or six vials of blood taken. Let me count the tests the surgeon wants....ten blood tests, a urinalysis, an EKG, and a two-view chest x-ray. All done. Bam.

Now my veins like to hide in my arms. When I was seated into the lab after registering, the nurse who looked up at me not only looked like my ex-husband *gak* but he had a look that said "I'm overwhelmed." I know they hire a lot of interns from a local nursing school, and they're usually good, but this one made me feel a little apprehensive just by the lost look on his face. I was praying I wouldn't get him, but of course, I did.

He was very nice. I told him my vein problems, he felt around on my left arm and said he found a vein, and he went for it, and he had to dig around in there just a little bit, not too bad, I've certainly had worse (or the worst yet, the hand. Ow that hurts. Glad we didn't have to go there.) Then the blood started slowing down as the vein started to...collapse (?)...and he dug around a little more and I started doing relaxing breathing exercises on tube no.5--you can hear them pop when they pull it of the syringe--then it was over. I looked over too soon--I close my eyes for any venipuncture--and the needle he used was HUGE and there was a large amount of very dark blood beading up on my inner elbow and I had a very vampiric moment there for a bit. Ugh. But he put a cotton ball on it and asked me to hold it, and it eventually stopped bleeding. He only blew it out a little, there's a small pale bruise with a bright red center where he stuck me and some blood leaked out of the vein inside the arm under the skin. Like I said, I've had worse, and hopefully it helped him become a better phlebotomist. I usually like the gray hairs to do my draws: they know exactly what they're doing, but sometimes one can't be fussy.

He also did my EKG. I got to keep my bra on for that one, although some of the electrodes go under the boobs...it was weird letting a strange man touch my body. I guess it was because he looked like my ex, whose name also started with an R but went by a nickname that started with an S. It felt a little like cheating even though it was just medical stuff. But he really did remind me of my ex. Although I'm pretty sure this guy is gay. :-) That made me relax quite a bit.

So everything is done, then next week I see my doctor and she'll fax everything over to the surgeon (and give me a copy *ahem*), and then we should be good to go. I'm going to email the nurse on Monday and advise her to look out for those records and if she doesn't have them by close of business to shoot me an email and I'll go back over on Tuesday and linger in the damn lobby until it's done if I have to. I am not fucking around here. Not anymore. Do it right or I'll come down like Thor's hammer. Politely, of course.

I'm slowing down a bit on the food-shoveling into my mouth. Things just don't taste good anymore. It's like having five cigarettes in a row--they didn't taste as good as you're going to feel after (phlegmy, coughy, and your mouth and body will smell like an ashtray). It's enough sometimes. Just...stop.

I haven't had a cigarette in 7 1/2 years, and although I sometimes think about it, and often wish I could light up, I don't. I can't. It will initiate bronchitis within 24 hours. I thought about trying those electronic cigarettes, but then I thought "what's the point? I've already kicked the habit..." LOL

My mom still smokes. Almost 74-years-old and she still smokes. Last time I saw her I almost asked her to bum one. Old habits die hard.

Thursday I see the gynecologist and we start a plan for my leaky, anemia-inducing vagina. Good times.

Yeah, it's a little bluish-green around it. Click to Embiggen

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