LilySlim - Weight loss

Friday, January 2, 2015

Well, That Was Weird

This afternoon my husband and I were driving to a doctor's appointment when suddenly my heart started pounding in my chest and I felt like what was a wave, a solid wave of dizziness, start at my feet and sweep up toward my head. I heard myself say, "Oh no. I forgot to eat." And then all I saw was black and white like on an old TV set that's lost its antenna.

I could hear my husband speaking but I could no longer respond. I remember thinking "how can I be having a blood sugar crash?" like I did when I had diabetes. Regardless, I clearly was. I did have hypoglycemia before I had Type II Diabetes (and which is now in remission due to DS surgery).

When I "came to," I don't know what else to call it, I felt like a statue. My mouth was open (in shock and awe?), my arms were on the armrests and, although I was thinking clearly, I could not move my body. This lasted for 10-20 seconds.

My husband offered to take me to get some food--and get out of his need for a blood draw and where we were headed--but I told him no, that I had some protein bars in my purse.

I did, do. I have a Protein Crunch bar in chocolate and protein, and it is, well, crunched, but if I needed to get something down in a pinch it would work; and a Quest protein bar, which, frankly, tastes what I imagine the bottom of a hamster cage tastes like. It is for dire emergencies only. Fortunately I had a KIND dark chocolate cherry cashew bar also in my purse, and I proceeded to gobble that--usually I eat it slowly, savoring it--and I felt better in a few minutes.

That was SO weird.

There have been a few other times I felt a little dizzy, but that was when I was still taking my high blood pressure medication and it was dropping my pressure too low. I quit taking those. My last reading was 119/68. Without medication. Awesome.

This was clearly a severe hypoglycemic event. I just had labs done and my levels couldn't have changed that dramatically in six weeks. I must always remember that deep down inside I am a diabetic and I will always be one. Just like I am always going to be a cancer patient. I cannot forget that my body would love to revert back to having diabetes, and that I must be ever on my guard to not gain back this weight, eat inappropriate things (like carbs and sugar), or ever, ever, ever forget what it felt like to be super morbidly obese--the inability to move, the shaming, the other health problems. THAT is why I had the surgery. How I look (and I hate how I look) is not important compared to these other factors. I should put this on an index card and whip it out every time my brain says "binge eat!" or "Chocolate" or "Donuts!" Because I can't think clearly when those cravings hit me. Maybe I should have it tattooed on the inside of my arm. LOL

One thing for sure--I can't forget to eat like I did today. As a formerly obese person, that is such an ironic concept. I never forgot to eat before surgery. But I don't want to repeat today's experience, especially if I'm alone. What if I'd been driving? OMG.

It's a fine line to walk--eat right and often enough, but not too much and not the wrong thing. But I must if I plan on doing any more living at all. And I'm SO ready for more living.

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I told my mom about this episode yesterday. She went to nursing school (quit six months shy of graduation to get married. Back then you couldn't attend the school if you were married.), and worked as a medical transcriber for years, and she's got a lot of medical knowledge, and she says that I did, indeed, faint. So I'm going to call my doctor and let her know tomorrow. I also want to know what my x-rays showed. Not that there's a lot of help for arthritis, but mostly out of curiosity.

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