Thursday, February 27, 2014

Support Groups

As a rule, I am not a joiner. When I was in college from 05 - 08, I joined several groups primarily to have things to put on my CV or resume. Really. One of the groups spent so much time screwing around at their meetings that I usually had to leave before they were over as I often had to catch the last bus without them ever getting down to business of the club.

When I got cancer, I didn't join any support groups. I connected with a few people online, and joined a Facebook group for my particular cancer (ocular, or eye), and although I try to cheer on people doing well and be supportive of those not doing well, I wouldn't exactly say I'm an active member.

I belong to a DS group on Facebook, but it's not real active.

I also don't belong to a church of any kind. Mostly because I hate getting up early on Sundays (and I'm not a Christian so churches I would be interested are few and far between).

I have little to zero tolerance for fool and idiots.There's always one PITA in every group who wants to ask "what if" questions that require one to have a crystal ball to answer them. I have no patience for that.

I've stayed off obesityhelp.org for about eight years when I realized I'd became obsessed with reading all the posts and finding out as much as I could about WLS and post-surgery life. I almost lost my job spending too much time on there at work. So I quit that cold turkey. I started visiting in recent months but I just don't see anything of value for me. It seems a little...cliquey, and again, I am not a joiner. Also? Everyone has advice an opinions, and the only advice I'm going to take is from my doctor. Period.

But...my surgeon offers various support groups throughout central and southern California, and so I decided to go to the monthly one in my area (a 140 mile round trip) tonight. It wasn't what I was expecting. It was more of an informational meeting for people wanting to learn about WLS and the various procedures. After the doctor left to do an appendectomy, the nurse started talking and there was a woman there who was four months post-op, and she had her surgery at the same place I'm having surgery, and her health has improved dramatically. Even her carpal tunnel syndrome and lactose intolerance have resolved. She's a happy woman and so is her husband. She gave me some good information and the nurse also answered a couple of questions I had about vitamin supplements. So was it worth all that driving and gas money? Not really. I may go again next month if I'm up for it post-surgery (providing I am post-surgery) and see if they do anything differently.

On the real bummer side, on our way down, a voicemail popped up on my cell phone. While R was at a truck stop restroom, I checked it. Well, the surgeon's office called yesterday at noon. Why I didn't get the voicemail before then is beyond me, except perhaps my phone is approaching two years old and I've noticed it having some problems in assorted areas (like taking 5 days to download an app. WTH?). Since it was after 5 o'clock when I got the message, I couldn't call. I can't imagine what it's about. The person who called is not someone I've dealt with before. I'm trying not to freak out over why they're calling. I already sent them a big pile of money....are they wondering where the rest is? Are they rescheduling? Did my insurance change their ever-loving minds!!? I can't imagine what it might be. I'm strung as tightly as a Stradivarius right now. I'm setting my alarm to call them at 9am. They should be open by then.

Also? My HSA reimbursement has not arrived. They usually take around seven days after claim submission, and it's just hitting that mark now. I'm really counting on that money to finish paying off the doctor and pay for a few nights of hotel near the hospital. Ack. I'm stressing, man. I'm stressing I tell you. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I wan this surgery to happen and be behind me. This is almost worse than the six weeks I had to wait in between my eye surgery and the radiation therapy. I knew that effer was in there growing the longer I waited and I wanted it dead. This is nearly that bad, but not as scary as cancer, of course. I guess I have a lot of anxiety since eight years ago I got to within four days of surgery before my insurance co pulled the rug out from under me. I'm going to be a mental patient until it's done and I'm limping down the hallway of the hospital in my bathrobe.

OMG, I'm going to go nuts. I swear. Nuttier. Whatever.

G*d grant me the serenity not to freak the HELL OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:-D

Here's my post-blood draw arm today. They always look worse before they get better.
click to embiggen.

2 comments:

  1. I didn't do in-person support groups, and I'm no longer a part of OH.com. However, I did find online support critical during the first few months out from the DS (I had no real complications, despite a wound that wouldn't heal for 6 months). Even with no complications, it's a trip and a half, and it helps to have a community that understands.

    There's one Yahoo group called DS Problems that's an excellent, NON-CHATTY resource for real medical issues. I subscribe to that. There's also OH DS Family, a closed thread on Facebook, that can deliver tough love but also excellent advice, if you take certain personalities with a grain of salt (I monitor it but comment very infrequently). And there's DS Recipes, a group on Facebook, that has some good ideas (ditto).

    Do it your own way, but some support of whatever variety will help.

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  2. Thanks for the great tips.. I'll check them all out. I'm on one DS group on Facebook, but I haven't gone on there much because it hasn't become really "real" until I made that first deposit. Plus there's some other sites online that I've visited. I'm fine with online stuff--not so much IRL. thanks again!

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